#findingpeace
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A Moment with Another Widow
Not like the Others I had a moment today. Something insanely karmic happened. I knew it when I was experiencing the moment that it was something uniquely special and there was a lesson here for me. Here in this moment. In this person I had just met and was talking with. I’ve had these random, Continue reading
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Managing The Widow Brain
Widow Brain and The Fog is Real I often go back through photos to remind myself what I was doing a year or two years ago. Widow brain and brain fog is a real thing. Settling down to one place for a while has me reminiscing more than I ever have since Eric left. Managing Continue reading
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Leaving More, Our Journey Continues
Leaving More of Myself I’ve been staring at a blank screen for a couple of hours now. I’m not sure why I’m having such a hard time starting this article. My late husband’s ashes rest in many places I’ve visited in the two and half years since he left. I expected the ceremonial process and Continue reading
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Speed Bump Days
The Intense Anxiety Another mile stone came and went this week. Monday would have been my 25th wedding anniversary. I knew this day would come. Not the speed bump day, but the day when I couldn’t run from the feelings. Until now, before this move to Chicago, I would just go wherever I want to Continue reading
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Role Models in A Widow’s Perpective
Definition of Role Models I wanted to share with you my writing prompt today in the most amazing book my daughter gave me for Christmas. It was “who are my role models and what qualities do they have?” I didn’t have to think long before I realized my daughter is my biggest role model and Continue reading
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All The Matters
What Really Matters Oh Hi!! WOW! The last few months have been CRAZY!! I try to keep up with everyone on social media. All of it matters. But let’s be honest, most of what is posted mixed with what is filtered is irrelevant. I am still in the process of reengaging. By reacting to a Continue reading
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New Year’s it’s still ME
New Year’s Reflection on the Old Me I’ll say it again, somehow the new year’s brings up all kinds of feelings. New year’s has that way of simultaneously inspiring reflection of the past while planning for the future. And while this is usually a good thing, it can also be traumatizing to some. First a Continue reading
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Grief in a New Year
New Year, New Memories Another holiday season has come. This year will soon be gone and a new year will be here. And just like all the others, 2022 will be a memory. I’ll add it to the memories I’ve made after trauma and loss. Grief in a new year. In this new world I’m Continue reading
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Time. In “quotation marks.”
“A “Time” for “Home”… I’ve been increasingly curious about time since my husband left me. I think I was in this “isolated bubble” so to speak. A place where I lived and didn’t observe much around me that didn’t include him. Now I have lived alone. I’ve traveled alone. Something I never really did before. Continue reading
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Times Change
Times Change. Love Doesn’t Seasons change and so does life. Life goes on even after someone we love dies. The death is a huge loss and an unmistakable marker in the life of the persons that loved them. However time is both forgiving and not. Times change and time changes things. It helps move around Continue reading
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Get Comfortable with the Uncomfortable
Comfort was a luxury We’ve all heard this phrase a lot. “Get comfortable with the uncomfortable.” Whether it be in the professional world or life coaching. I’ve always taken it as a motivational phrase. Somehow though, after losing a significant other, it has taken on a different meaning to me. I haven’t been comfortable with Continue reading
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Grief Guilt. A Journal Entry
Grief Guilt Never Really Leaves, Does It? Grief guilt is a strange thing. Guilt is a stage of the grieving process. It’s also a huge part of complicated grief. Different clinical stages of grief exist also. Just when I think I’m doing better and feeling good about the direction I’m heading, here comes a wave. Continue reading
About Me and My Grief Journey
My grief journey began in the Summer of 2020. I became a widow overnight. Without warning, my entire life was turned upside down, broken into pieces I didn’t know how to put back together. Writing became my anchor—my way to breathe, process, and heal, even in small, fractured moments.
After losing Eric, I was diagnosed with PTSD, complicated grief, and an anxiety disorder. For a long time, I was paralyzed by my own emotions. I traveled across the U.S. for over two years, mostly alone, learning how to carry myself through the aftermath of sudden loss.
Along the way, I found love again. Greg became an important part of my life, bringing companionship, laughter, and even new challenges. Losing him to suicide has been another unimaginable heartbreak that shapes much of what I write here. Through it all, my emotional support animals —Odin (dog) and Freija (cat)— keep me grounded and remind me there is still love, life, and care to give.
I moved and now reside in Chicago, Illinois. This city, this home, is my space to rebuild, to grieve, and to explore who I am beyond loss.
What you will find here
This blog started as a place to house my writing. Over time, it’s become much more. Here, I reflect on grief, healing, and the messy, beautiful, often difficult journey of life after sudden loss. I write about my day-to-day experiences, the struggles and triumphs with my diagnoses, and anything else that captures my heart and attention.
My journey on podcasts
Many of my articles are available in podcast form on Spotify and Amazon Music. I welcome your comments—I love feedback. Let’s share this journey together, and maybe find adventure along the way.