widow
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When Healing Asks You to Begin Again
The Last Thing on My List For months, moving after loss has sat on my horizon like the last mountain I knew I’d eventually have to climb. After Greg died last October, I made a mental list of everything I needed to do just to get by. There were urgent things, and there were hard… Continue reading
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PTSD: Understanding the Daily Effects on the Nervous System
Today, I want to talk about PTSD or Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. PTSD is a mental health condition that affects millions of people worldwide. I was diagnosed shortly after finding my husband passed away. Many circumstances and traumatic events can cause PTSD. In this article, I want to focus on understanding its impact on the nervous… Continue reading
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Life, Loss and Change
Hi there…well, yeah, it’s been a minute. Change has pulled me in different directions, leading writing to take a backseat. However, journaling remains a constant. I’m on the verge of completing my companion workbook to “The Narcissistic Tangle.” A major life shift occurred recently for those unaware—I moved back to Chicago in September. Reflecting on… Continue reading
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Grace and Independence: A Valentine’s Day Guide for Widows
Valentine’s Day can stir a mix of emotions, particularly for widows. This day of love and companionship can bring about memories of a past life with a loved one. This can sometimes be difficult when we are alone or grieving. However, it also serves as an opportunity for self-care and a reflection of personal strength.… Continue reading
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Finding Your Path After Loss: Two Journeys, One Strength
I’ve been asking myself the same question for some time, “Where do I go from here?” It’s also a question I never really have an answer for. I had a different yet familiar sort of conversation today about finding a path after loss. At work of course, and she was a recent widow. She was… Continue reading
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A Realization of Widowhood: Navigating the Reality of Being Single
Realization of Widowhood…Setting IN I. Am. Single. Yes, that’s what I said. It’s a hard realization of widowhood. It really doesn’t matter how long you were married before, the law only recognizes “until death do you part.” So now, whether you want to be or not, like it or not, you are single! It’s hard… Continue reading
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A Grief Journey Continued: Chasing Clarity
The Anniversary of the Beginning I must confess, my last post about facing the fourth anniversary of the start of my grief journey was a bit of a joke to me and not the haha kind. Although I wrote and rewrote it several times, no words seemed to convey what I was experiencing. I couldn’t… Continue reading
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Twenty-one Days: Cherishing Moments and Memories
21 DAY REWIND June 14th, 2020 was a Sunday. I will be stuck in this moment for the rest of my life whether I want to or not. Strange how trauma does that to the mind. As this anniversary is rapidly approaching, so goes my train of thought into a rewind. My brain seems to… Continue reading
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Self-Publishing Journey: Overcoming Challenges & Celebrating Rewards
I didn’t know it then, but this self-publishing journey began several years ago. When I first started journaling my deepest, darkest thoughts in 2020, it wasn’t until about eight months later that a book started to shape in my mind. That one is still yet to be written, but I have taken that energy and… Continue reading
About The Blue Widow Chronicles and Me
The Blue Widow Chronicles began after my husband, Eric, died suddenly in 2020. I became a widow overnight, and the writing became the place I went to make sense of a life that no longer made sense.
What began as writing through grief has grown with me.
Over the years, I’ve written my way through widowhood, PTSD and trauma, solo travel, love after loss, losing Greg to suicide, starting over, complicated relationships, and the ongoing work of figuring out who I am when the life I once knew no longer exists.
This isn’t a blog about having grief figured out. I write from wherever I actually am—sometimes healing, sometimes questioning, sometimes rebuilding, and sometimes admitting I have no idea what comes next.
Odin and Freija frequently find their way into these pages too, along with the people, places, memories, and ordinary moments that remind me life continues even when it looks nothing like the one I expected.
What You’ll Find Here
The Chronicles are personal essays about grief, trauma, identity, love, relationships, travel, rebuilding, and life after loss. Some were written from inside the experience. Others look back years later with a perspective I couldn’t have had when everything was happening.
There are more than five years of stories here. You don’t need to read them in order. Start wherever something speaks to you.
Beyond the Pages
Some stories can be told publicly. Others need a smaller room.
Beyond the Pages is the more intimate side of The Blue Widow Chronicles on Patreon—a growing private library of previously unpublished journal entries, deeper reflections on the Chronicles, member-only writing, and guided writing resources.
Membership is $5/month and includes access to the complete growing library.
Come further in —Beyond the Pages