Blue Widow Chronicles

From loss to living. This is my story.

Another Chapter Ends

greg with odin

No sugar coating the reality of my existence. I’m living in the aftermath of another relationship cut off too soon.

Back in 2020, my husband of 23 years left suddenly in the wee morning hours without any sound or notice. I discovered him the next morning on the floor of the downstairs bathroom. Our love story was over. One thing I knew for sure was that he did not want to leave. We had everything going right.

A few years later, after taking a very long time to heal and reach a point where I could be around people again, I rekindled a friendship with one of my late husband’s childhood friends. Eventually, that friendship became something more.

And then I found myself here again.

I originally wrote Another Chapter Ends in the immediate aftermath of losing him. At the time, I published the entire piece here because this blog was where I put what I couldn’t carry alone.

I’ve chosen not to erase that writing or rewrite it with everything I know now. But I’ve also decided that some of the most intimate parts of this story no longer need to live completely in public.

I’ve moved the original entry, unchanged, to Beyond the Pages.

Come further in.

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2 responses to “Another Chapter Ends”

  1. marianallen Avatar
    marianallen

    Oh, Candy, I am SO SORRY! I have no words.

    Reply
    1. The Blue Widow Avatar
      The Blue Widow

      Thank you Auntie M. I’m trying my best to manage.

      Reply

Tell Me Something Good

About The Blue Widow Chronicles and Me

The Blue Widow Chronicles began after my husband, Eric, died suddenly in 2020. I became a widow overnight, and the writing became the place I went to make sense of a life that no longer made sense.

What began as writing through grief has grown with me.

Over the years, I’ve written my way through widowhood, PTSD and trauma, solo travel, love after loss, losing Greg to suicide, starting over, complicated relationships, and the ongoing work of figuring out who I am when the life I once knew no longer exists.

This isn’t a blog about having grief figured out. I write from wherever I actually am—sometimes healing, sometimes questioning, sometimes rebuilding, and sometimes admitting I have no idea what comes next.

Odin and Freija frequently find their way into these pages too, along with the people, places, memories, and ordinary moments that remind me life continues even when it looks nothing like the one I expected.

What You’ll Find Here

The Chronicles are personal essays about grief, trauma, identity, love, relationships, travel, rebuilding, and life after loss. Some were written from inside the experience. Others look back years later with a perspective I couldn’t have had when everything was happening.

There are more than five years of stories here. You don’t need to read them in order. Start wherever something speaks to you.

Beyond the Pages

Some stories can be told publicly. Others need a smaller room.

Beyond the Pages is the more intimate side of The Blue Widow Chronicles on Patreon—a growing private library of previously unpublished journal entries, deeper reflections on the Chronicles, member-only writing, and guided writing resources.

Membership is $5/month and includes access to the complete growing library.

Come further in —Beyond the Pages

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