Setting Healthy Boundaries: Tips for Maintaining Good Health

February 17, 2024

Setting Healthy Boundaries: Tips for Maintaining Good Health

blue flowers on a sidewalk setting boundaries

The Importance of Setting Healthy Boundaries

Hello all, my days have been busy, to say the least. Between work and house chores, my publishing business takes up any free time I have left. Whereas, I’m in the process of writing a non-fiction manuscript about identifying and healing from toxic relationships with a focus on intergenerational trauma. It will cover how to spot a narcissist, what traits to look for, what effects these relationships have on us, and most importantly, how to heal. I’ll reveal more about this as I get closer to publishing, but for now, I want to talk about something closely related. It’s something near and dear to my heart: how to set healthy boundaries.

Healthy boundaries are essential to maintaining good mental and emotional health. Boundaries are the guidelines you establish for yourself and others on what is acceptable and what is not. While they help you communicate your needs and values, they also protect you from being overwhelmed and taken advantage of by others. Whereas I struggle with setting boundaries and often allow those closest to me to go beyond what I am comfortable with in their actions and words.

Identify Your Boundaries

Here, are some tips I’m working on to create healthy boundaries in my life. Certainly, I felt I was not the only one struggling, so let’s get to it. The first is to Identify Your Boundaries. Specifically take a moment to reflect on your values, needs, and preferences. What are the things that make you uncomfortable or stressed? What are the things that you value the most in your life? Knowing your boundaries will help you communicate them better to others.

Communicating Your Boundaries to Others

Once you’ve identified what makes you comfortable and uncomfortable, the next step is Communicating Your Boundaries to others. Be clear and assertive about what you need and want. Don’t be afraid to say no or to ask for what you need.

Enforcing Your Boundaries

The third step is the hardest for me. It is Being Consistent with enforcing your boundaries. Consistency is essential when it comes to setting healthy boundaries. Stick to your boundaries, even if it initially feels uncomfortable or difficult. Over time, others will respect your boundaries and adjust their behavior accordingly.

Fourth, and I mention this often in my writing, Practice Self Care. Taking care of yourself is essential for maintaining healthy boundaries. Make sure to prioritize your physical and emotional well-being. Take breaks when necessary, practice relaxation techniques, and seek support when necessary.

Final Thoughts

Lastly, when I was researching this article, a final step was mentioned. The fifth step was to be flexible. I can’t entirely agree with this. However, I suggest never compromising on who you are and the boundaries you set, no matter who gets upset or demanding. Your boundaries are yours to keep you safe. There is no room for negotiation, ever.

My final words to you are this: setting and enforcing healthy boundaries can be challenging; however, it’s essential for maintaining good mental and emotional health. I wish I had discovered earlier in life, but hey, it’s never too late to start something new that can tremendously benefit your well-being. By identifying your boundaries, communicating them clearly, and practicing self-care, you can establish healthy relationships and live a more fulfilling life.

If you would like more info on this subject, click here to go to PositivePsychology.com. You will find an in-depth article relating this subject to Cognitive Behavioral Therapy.

Thanks for reading. I love you all –xxooC

sculpture in st louis missouri setting boundaries

Thoughts and Notes

#findingpeace, #healthyboundaries, #selflove, #settingboundaries, #widow

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About Me and My Grief Journey

My grief journey began in the Summer of 2020. I became a widow overnight. Without warning, my entire life was turned upside down, broken into pieces I didn’t know how to put back together. Writing became my anchor—my way to breathe, process, and heal, even in small, fractured moments.

After losing Eric, I was diagnosed with PTSD, complicated grief, and an anxiety disorder. For a long time, I was paralyzed by my own emotions. I traveled across the U.S. for over two years, mostly alone, learning how to carry myself through the aftermath of sudden loss.

Along the way, I found love again. Greg became an important part of my life, bringing companionship, laughter, and even new challenges. Losing him to suicide has been another unimaginable heartbreak that shapes much of what I write here. Through it all, my emotional support animals —Odin (dog) and Freija (cat)— keep me grounded and remind me there is still love, life, and care to give.

I moved and now reside in Chicago, Illinois. This city, this home, is my space to rebuild, to grieve, and to explore who I am beyond loss.

What you will find here

This blog started as a place to house my writing. Over time, it’s become much more. Here, I reflect on grief, healing, and the messy, beautiful, often difficult journey of life after sudden loss. I write about my day-to-day experiences, the struggles and triumphs with my diagnoses, and anything else that captures my heart and attention.

My journey on podcasts

Many of my articles are available in podcast form on Spotify and Amazon Music. I welcome your comments—I love feedback. Let’s share this journey together, and maybe find adventure along the way.

Blue Widow Chronicles